Monday, December 04, 2006

"Lots of things you can do with a stopwatch"

1. Robin Hood - another suck-less episode! Damn you, Hood! Perhaps this is it; perhaps the series took seven episodes to work the political unsubtleties out of its system, clear out the outrageous anachronisms and generally find its feet, and from here on in the quality will hold.

Well, we'll see, anyway.

2. Torchwood - OK, now that is the second best episode. (Come on Torchwood, surprise me, outdo the fairies episode!) Although the plot was not without its woolly bits, there was generally less wool than in previous episodes, and you could easily spin your way through it. Lots of nice foreshadowing too. There are but a few questions that need to be answered:

a) Who was supposed to be in charge of continuity for this episode, and were they flayed for pitch night giving way to full daylight in "minutes" towards the end of the episode? The one obvious gaffe that I could spot, but such a major one.

b) Emily Dickinson - why? (Not an existential question.) It's just me, this one. Ever since they used the exact same quote about Death Kindly Stopping For Me in a Babylon 5 episode, I've found her poetry twee and irksome. And the same piece just keeps turning up on TV shows - bah!

c) How did the police get hold of the exact correct edition of ED's poetry in the dead of night, and where did Toshiko's intuitive leap about the ISBN come from? Because from where I was sitting that whole business seemed to have been hand-delivered to the characters by the scriptwriters. "What makes you say that, Tosh?" "Well, it's right here in this script thing."

d) So just what can you do with a stopwatch? I mean, I'm a man of the world, squire, know what I mean? But I'm utterly dumbfounded by this. It's clearly some sort of innuendo from the context, but - what?! You know, stopwatch. Stopwatch, nudge nudge. Oh, right, yeah. Stopwatch. What?!?
"Lots of things you can do with a stopwatch"? I can think of one - timing things. So apart from some sort of kinky timing game, I'm stuck for ideas here. Captain Jack "can think of a few". Ianto has "a whole list". Here, for the benefit of the readers at home, it is.
Ianto Jones' List Of Things You Can Do With A Stopwatch
1. You can take that stopwatch and shove it right up your...

No, I'm stumped.

But aside from all that, a very fine episode.


Gareth Edwards said...

I'm puzzled by this stopwatch thing too. I thought perhaps it referred to something I missed in two episodes I didn't see, but fansites seem to be as puzzled as I am. Most seem confident (hopeful?) that it's something sexy, though. I suppose that's implied, but without being more specific it's just silly, ain't it?

Skeeter said...

I think its aerobic in nature. You know, they're going to time each other doing star jumps or something...OK went to a baaaad place just then, anyone care to join me? ;-)

John Toon said...

The most amusing suggestion I've seen on the Who forums is that, because Jack can't die and because he killed Ianto's murderous Cyber-girlfriend and Ianto wasn't too happy about it, Ianto will kill Jack in a variety of ways and then use the stopwatch to time how long it takes him to recover. Sort of S&M for immortals, if you like (or even if you don't like).

It's better than M&S for immortals, dat fo' damn sho'.

-carbo- said...

john toon i have 2 agree with ur idea about the stopwatch tho that really is only one thing u can do with it tho i suppose u mean that all the different ways of killing jack are ianto's list of things i guess... i never would have thought of that i thought it was sum sort of weird sexual connotation or is that just me??lol

Jotun said...

I Always sort of thought it had something to do with the previous conversation (about there being a lack of space for corpses).

Anonymous said...

If Jack can't die, can he still get Herpes?

Anonymous said...

I think i may be the only person who had no problems at all imagining all sorts of things that can be done with a stop watch.

Anonymous said...

Anonymous, Can you share a few ideas? I have no clue